Losing Trust

Who Can I Trust Anymore???

I keep looking
to my friends and family
with doubts and hostility,
having to wonder
whether what secrets
they hide beneath their skin,
waiting to crawl out unexpectedly,
sending shivers down my spine.
Yet, why should I even think
these beasts of deceit exist?
What pushes me to question
all that is told to me?
And then I remember...
and I don't feel so bad
for looking for the motives.
For looking for
what are really behind those words,
what the flowery scent hides,
what the cloth conceals.
Is this all a magic trick,
and you're awaiting the right moment
to reveal all to me,
or do you plan to keep me
in the dark forever,
taking my lantern
and leaving me in the dark?

The frustration is unbearable.
For, if I can't rely on my allies"
to tell me the truth,
who am I to turn to
for honest answers?
Who am I to call on
when all else fails?
I can't go through life alone,
with all these emotions
bottled up like angry bees
stuffed in a sack;
I'm about to burst open,
yet there's no one but myself
to look to,
as so many drift
further and further away
on the currents of life,
swimming for their own paradises,
as I dog paddle out to sea
with no map and no boat.


"She was Daenerys Stormborn, the Unburnt, khaleesi and queen, Mother of Dragons, slayer of warlocks, breaker of chains, and there was no one in the world that she could trust."
-George R.R. Martin